Leaving tomorrow

Whoa. I can't believe it's here. I officially fly out of Omaha at 9:50 am Tuesday.

It's been an emotional roller coaster as I've said goodbye to some of my favorite people. Here are some pics of me and friends that I'll be missing the next 8 months.

My amazing family. Thanks to jordanwilliamgreen.com for making the fam look good :)

My grandpa. Yes, he is the cutest thing in the whole world. When I was a baby I wouldn't sleep unless he was holding me when my grandparents would babysit me. Ever since then, we always say we're pretty well bonded.

My bestest friends Meisha and Angie. I could write paragraphs about both of them and how much they mean to me.

The Communications Team at Christ Community Church. Here's Robert, myself and Greg. I have been super spoiled with working at CCC as the graphic designer for the last 3 years.

If you have a second check out Robert's blog at http://ramhatter.blogspot.com

Here's me and Kelly who is the receptionist at CCC. The joke at CCC was that my second office was at Kelly's desk because I stopped by and chatted with her everyday.

Hope Center staff. If you want to volunteer and make a difference in North Omaha and hang out with some pretty amazing kids, you should check out The Hope Center. www.hopecenterforkids.com

My roommates. Jenny, myself and Anna have lived together for the last year and it has been so much fun. They are the sweetest, godliest girls and I love how many amazing memories I have from living together.

Miss Kelley. When we first met I stuck my foot in my mouth and the outlook for our friendship looked pretty grim but luckily we ended up being great friends and I will miss her a lot.

Here's me and my friends from a prayer group I was lucky enough to be a part of. The top picture of Eloise, a godly woman who is the sweetest thing in the world and 100% devoted to Jesus. Linda is a friend and a mentor I've known from the very beginning of my journey with God and faith. She and her husband Jack are like my second parents. And lastly, Susie. Susie is super funny but also has with a soft heart and sincere love for people. I have learned so much from them and am so blessed to call them friends

I could keep going and going and going but it's late and I have a plane to catch.

Prayer Request:

- Safe travels

- My luggage arrives in New Zealand (on time)

- That God would go before me and direct my path all the way to my hostel in NZ

Hope Card pictures

Here are some cards I got from kids at the Hope Center when I had a going away party a couple weeks ago:

I like this one because he's not thanking me that I taught HIM to draw but that I taught "the kids" how to draw, like he's thanking me on their behalf :)

This is the inside of the card. It has some suspense with the arrow... "I will miss...." what could it be??

"You". yup. couldn't quite fit that in the inside.

This one is a First Communion card that apparently said it all so Johnina just signed her name.

This is just a page of stickers, but who doesn't love stickers?

And finally a picture of someone... hopefully not me because this person has some serious acne and crazy sunshine hands, but awesome pants.

Kids at the Hope Center are wonderful and amazing. I'm really going to miss them.

Time flies

Since being done with work, I've had lots of time to relax, reflect and spend time with friends. I leave in 9 days and it seems like each day comes and goes faster and faster.

The thing that I'm most excited about when I get to New Zealand, is experiencing God in new ways and seeing what He wants to teach me while I'm over there. You know when you've been friends with someone for a while but then there's that one conversation when you realize you have way more in common than you thought and that you're going to be friends for a long time? I think that's what I mean when I say I'm excited for my relationship with God to go to a deeper level. Even though I feel like I have a solid relationship with Jesus there are aspects to my faith that I can tell I was just "talking the talk". Dropping everything and moving has pushed me to "walk the walk" in so many areas of my faith especially trusting God and not worrying about the future.

One lesson that has been freeing for me is that I can't screw up God's plans for my life. If I'm pursuing Him then I'm just not powerful enough to mess up His plans. He works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28, paraphrased). God doesn't need my help. In fact sometimes when I'm trying to help Him with His plans, most of the time, I end up getting in the way and making the whole thing about me instead of surrendering to Him and letting Him work. I picture a little girl helping her mom make cookies. The little girl wants to help but most likely she'll end up making a giant mess and the cookies get made despite her "help", not because of it. But it's not about the end result, it's about the fun you have making the cookies. And I'm sure as I've been going through this journey God has gotten some good laughs at me trying to figure things out and watching me make plenty of messes.

Verses that have spoke to me the last couple days:

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.

Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart’s desires. Commit everything you do to the LORD. Trust him, and he will help you. - Psalm 37:4-5

Unemployed

I was thinking about this and realized the last time I was unemployed, I was a sophomore in high school. Needless to say, it feels weird.

I didn't want to cry my last day at Christ Community Church, and I was so busy that I didn't think it would be hard, but then all of a sudden in the afternoon it started hitting me. I felt the tears coming and I didn't know if I could stop them. It was difficult but I held them off until I got in my car. CCC has been more than an amazing job and the staff has been more than fellow co-workers, they've been my family and CCC has been my home.

After I got in my car, I headed to my second job at the Hope Center for Kids for yet another "last day". The kids had a goodbye party for me last night there and all made me cards (which I'll post my favorites of when I find my camera cord). I know I will never forget their little faces. I have loved being in their lives and it has been so good for my soul to work there as the Art Coordinator for the last 8 months. God is doing an amazing work in North Omaha and raising up some pretty incredible leaders at the Hope Center.

Even though it feels a little scary, I know that God is the only thing I can count on to be consistent and my rock the rest of my life. I also know God is calling me to New Zealand at this time and as a former co-worker (Dusty White) of mine says "You have to choose your calling over your comfort".

Verses I've been saying a lot lately:

Matthew 6:33

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Hebrews 12:2

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

Car

here's a fun story:

I've been praying about how in the world I'm going to get around in NZ, especially on breaks from school. I just figured I would make friends with someone with a car and figure it out when I get there. Randomly the other night a guy named Mark, who is at Bible School right now, messaged me on Facebook about buying his car. It's a 1992 Toyota Corolla (I know fancy) and said he bought it from someone at Bible School when he first got there. I was a little uneasy about making such a big decision without even seeing the car first hand but God works in crazy ways so I decided to pray about it.

The next day I was reading this blog and a quote jumped out at me: "You need to think, but you can't over think. Over analysis leads to paralysis! " by Mark Batterson. I decided to message Mark back and ask if the car was still available. I liked the fact that I would be buying it from someone at the Bible School and after looking at prices for that car on other websites, I realized the price was a really good deal. He had mentioned sometimes students share a car but since I don't really know anyone that's going I figured that wasn't an option.

When I got onto Facebook I noticed a girl named Michelle had also messaged me. She's going to the same school in July so we've become friends on Facebook but haven't talked that much. Mark had also told her about the car and she wanted to know if I wanted to share it with her. Unbelievable! I was so nervous about spending that much money but God worked it out. I told her I would love to share it with her so this little beauty will be coming on my NZ adventure with me and my new friend Michelle.

Yes, that's the Canadian flag painted on the door. Good thing Michelle is Canadian and good thing she knows how to drive a manual because I don't, but I'm excited to learn!

Prayer Request:

- Praise that God has provided such a cheap way to have a car

- Continued prayer for finishing up freelance projects

- Continued prayer for packing, this weekend I should be able to get most of my house packed

God's grace

I've had some time to reflect on the journey God has taken me on these last few years. The overall theme has been God's grace.

College Ministry

I was not even close to ready or qualified to lead a small group in the college ministry at CCC four years ago. Through God putting it on people's hearts to take a chance and His grace, I was able to be a "leader-in-training" for about a year and co-lead the next. After co-leading for a year I transitioned to coaching small group leaders, which I've done for the last couple years. Getting into leadership was a way God pushed me to take the steps of faith that I had felt lukewarm about before. It has been full of overwhelming and deeply joyful experiences with people. I now see how important prayer is with leading or mentoring and how little it has to do with you telling people what to do and not to do. It was a shift for me when I saw that people need prayer and love first and guidance second.

Graphic Design at CCC

Likewise, God planted me here at Christ Community Church as the graphic designer way before I was qualified. My boss, Nick Kelly, still jokes about how he would probably not hired me but since I was all ready working part-time when the previous designer quit he took a chance. My design skills have improved immensely working at CCC. I believe I've had a designer's dream job. The variety of projects and team I've worked on are incredible. Most of all, by God putting me in a work environment with all Christians it helped me find my identity in God at a time when I was living 2 different lifestyles and not being consistent.

Compass Ministries

This one is pretty funny. Six years ago I got in trouble and had to do some community service and someone in my small group suggested I check out Compass. Again by God's grace, they let me help out at their Kids Church on Sundays. After I was done with the community service I still wanted to come each week. I think I learned more each Sunday at Kids Church than I did anywhere else those first years. The messages were so simple and since I never went to Sunday school, it was the first time I was hearing them. I also fell in love with the kids. I went down there thinking I was going to help them when in fact, they have changed me forever. Seeing the circumstances they grow up in but still maintain their innocence is nothing short of amazing. And they're hilarious.

The list goes on and on and on. As I embark on this adventure to New Zealand I definitely feel under qualified. But as God has shown me over and over, He doesn't need me to be qualified because He is. He just asks for my obedience and trust.

Prayer Request:

- Praise for the overwhelming support and love I have felt from fellow staff at CCC

- Continued prayer for freelance projects to be able to be completed.

- Prayer for packing. That I would be a blessing as I leave the home I live in and for wisdom for what clothes and stuff to bring to NZ (I know, I'm such a girl)

Packing begins

This week I started packing and it's a mix of emotions for me. Part of me is ready to start this adventure I've been preparing for since last year and the other part of me wants to hold onto the life I have here in Omaha.

I've been reading a book by Mark Batterson, Wild Goose Chase, and it's been exactly what I needed to read right now. Apparently Celtic Christians had the name "An Geadh-Glas" for the Holy Spirit which can be translated to "the Wild Goose". His book is all about taking risks and getting outside our comforts to chase the Holy Spirit. He goes through different "cages" we can find ourselves in that prevent us from chasing the Wild Goose which are; cage of responsibility, cage of routine, cage of assumptions, cage of guilt, cage of failure and cage of fear. I like a few quotes from the book: "Lord, thank You that You want us to get where You want us to go more than we want to get where You want us to go." and "God is far more concerned about your future than you are." and lastly this quote: "The unpredictable twists and turns of life can drive you crazy. Or you can learn to enjoy the journey. The choice is yours."

Prayer Request:

- Praise for continued support and prayers from friends and family

- Prayer for what to pack and what to give away

- Prayer for freelance projects. That I would be able to complete them before I go and discernment for what projects to say no to.

less than 40 days

I leave on July 13th so the countdown began on Tuesday.

After a lot of help from my sister and tons of prayer, I have my Student Visa, medical insurance, school paid and even my international student ID card. I think these next 39 days will fly by and I'll be in limbo for most of it.

God has been so faithful these last months. He has provided in ways I couldn't have imagined. My roommates have someone to move in when I leave, which is a huge answer to prayer. I have felt more peace about this huge transition in my life and that can only be from the Holy Spirit because my normal tendency is to freak out. God has been teaching me so much about material possessions and what true trust and faith is.

As I take this next step I'm leaving 2 wonderful jobs, 2 wonderful roommates and my amazing family and friends. I feel like I'm putting everything on the line. I think being a Christian is about taking risks and I have been praying for a long time now that God would make me a biblical Christian not just a comfortable Christian. I want to have faith like the people in Hebrew chapter 11.

Prayer Request:

- Praise for getting all my paperwork in and approved for school

- Pray for God to provide great friends for me at school

- Pray that I will be able to bless others with the things I won't be taking with me